Tuesday, December 6, 2022

I am Leaving a Discussion Group for Seniors


CPQ is an agency that runs numerous programs for people of all ages including older adults.  A few months ago, I started attending a discussion group at their Little Neck location publicized as a senior singles group.  I didn’t expect it to be a dating service, but I thought I should at least check it out.  I was never thrilled with it, but I felt it was better than sitting at home for a few hours each week.  I thought the discussion would be related to senior singles whether they were never married, divorced, or widowed.  The discussions were essentially small talk about mundane topics mostly of interest to women as about 80% of the participants were female. There were usually several people who dominated the conversation and thus it was difficult for me to get a word in edgewise.

A social worker from the agency is supposed to be a moderator, but she acted like one of the seniors.  I think the moderator at the beginning of each session should ask for a list of topics and give a time limit for each one and ensure that everyone has a chance to speak on the topic.  The sessions should not be a verbal free-for-all.  Another suggestion is to split it into smaller groups so the participants can get to know each other.  After attending several sessions, I feel the other seniors are still strangers.

What is the sense to go out of my way to attend a meeting and being bored and can’t wait till it ends?  I am most disappointed that I was ignored after I sent emails to two social workers whom I know to  suggest there be a men-only discussion group.  There is nothing to lose by trying.  There are more women in the senior population, but perhaps enough men would be interested.

A former boss of mine once told me “If you are happy, stay, if not leave.”  This applies here.


 

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